Mom & Mercedes hitting the slots together again

I can only imagine the special reunion between Mom and one of her best friends, Mercedes. Add in Mr. and Mrs. DeGrandis and the rest of my wacky family members and they have a full-fledged non-stop party absolutely out of this world. Main course: Pasta and meatballs!

Mercedes Karpinski Spotts died February 14, 2011.

Mom and Mercedes were life long friends since high school, if not before. They wound up going to Notre Dame Academy, the old school on Ansel Road, way back when--as they and my Aunt still says, "A million years ago!"

I never remember a time not knowing Mercedes. She was a doll and a role model. She mimic'd Mom's strength, willingness to speak her mind (which I have), zest for life, being a problem solver rather than idly standing by, finesse for gambling, & most importantly, love of family and God. Oh yes, their heritage too. Just as Mom was so very proud of her Italian and Bohemian upbringing, Mercedes just as enthusiastic and proud of her Polish background.

Mercedes did not come over as much as she wanted because of our dogs...that was one difference between us all. She was not a dog lover and we were consumed with all of our dogs.

I never saw her when she did not have a smile on her face and something incredible to say about Mom. She had the best sense of humor and pretty much poked fun at everyone, most importantly herself!

At Mass, she and Mom would always sit together in their pew. God forbid someone else slip in their spots! Mercedes would tell my choir director David after Mass that I was singing to HER rather than my Mom.....and would speak 'crazytalk' requesting that I sing her funeral. I never thought that time would come so soon and believed that request was far off into the future.

Mercedes walked with a cane, which slowed her down a bit. That's the only thing that slowed her down. She was one of the sharpest women I knew. She still drove. She'd steal Mom away to go to lunch, dinner, high school reunions, and gambling jaunts. Even after Mom's mobility suffered, Mercedes still tried getting her out of the house every so often. They had a core group of friends who would travel around having fun well into their 70's as they neared the 80 mark.

When our church had a special fundraiser, night of a thousand dinners, Mercedes was one of our guests. Everyone loved her and she adored the rest of our dinner guests. Her laugh, infectious, and knowledge astounding. As usual, she held the floor most of the time.

Probably one of the best vacations Mom had was with Mercedes, and I believe, Mrs. DeGrandis. Mercedes was heading to Las Vegas for business and convinced Mom and Mrs. D. to join her! Mom talked about that trip up until she died. And Mercedes was simply amazed at Mom's luck.

I believe the real last big event they attended was a milestone high school reunion maybe 5 years before Mom passed. Again, they both had such a tremendous time together and with so many of their classmates, who were all still alive. Those ladies really knew how to party and do it up right! Hopefully, I will follow in their footsteps in that respect as well.


After Mom died, Mercedes pulled me aside and said she was taking me under her wing. If there was anything at all I needed, I should call her. She and I also went out to lunch periodically. She'd ask how I was REALLY doing.....she'd ask if they were treating me nicely at work.....and then she'd ask me about my love life. She, like Mom, was very concerned with finding me a nice boy who was going to take care of me. I told her it was in God's hands, but I did want a nice boy one day! She'd give me a big sigh and say, "I don't get it. You are smart, talented, beautiful, have the voice of an angel, the prettiest smile..."

Besides everything else Mercedes did for me, she always boosted my self esteem!


Mercedes is in a much better place --the destination she and my Mom worked their whole lives to reach. She's perfect--no ills, no pain, no walking cane anymore. She's with her Mom and Dad and sister Gloria.


The best thing I can do to keep their spirits alive and continue making them proud is incorporate into my daily life the ideals Mom and Mercedes taught me which include, keeping my faith strong, spreading the good word of God by example, living life to the fullest, enjoying family & friends, never giving up or doubting myself, celebrating God & life, using the talents God gave me, and of course sharing delicious meals with those I love and playing the slots every chance I get --especially when the new casino opens in Cleveland!

Go Tribe! (that was for Mom!!)

Happy Valentine's Day!

For someone who is not 'in-love' with Valentine's Day right now, I had a tremendous Valentine's Weekend!

Funny how this seems to be the one 'man-made holiday' (other than maybe sweetest day, another consumer-driven holiday) where you love it if you are in love or have that special someone and absolutely abhor it if you are single, not in a relationship, recently broken up, or pining for someone who may not have the same feelings.

I must admit, though I never have a guy on Valentine's Day --except for 'Mango Man' many, many years ago, I'm a sucker for the traditions. I grew up in a house where we celebrated V-Day every year. My Mom and sister made these adorable felt sequined hearts for all of us to wear....when I was old enough, I got into the act. We'd hit Malley's for their chocolate hearts and jelly hearts. I'd buy Mom flowers. I'd get Valentine's cards and send them out en masse or pass out the small children's ones to my friends with candy attached. I'd bake my famous chocolate chip muffins and make a heart-shaped chocolate chip cake. For some reason, 1 of the most memorable Valentine's Days was oh so many years ago when we were all together and my sister made these delicious cinnamon muffins for breakfast.

Now don't get me wrong. There is some bitterness attached at times. Carrie Bradshaw, of 'Sex and the City' fame and Sue Sylvester of 'Glee' had the right idea. Both of them married themselves.

The single girl gets slighted over and over. The single girl may get birthday gifts, but usually never of the caliber only delivered by a husband or boyfriend, a Mother, or even lover. The single girl NEVER the center of attention with gifts galore showered upon her the likes of a woman about to embark on marriage --at a wedding shower....or a woman with child --at a baby shower. The single girl never gets the opportunity to receive ridiculous amounts of cash being tossed in an ornately decorated, multi-tier box set smack dab next to a wedding cake. And the single girl never gets wined and dined on her birthday, wedding anniversary, valentine's day, sweetest day, or any other 'holiday of love' including Christmas by the man of her dreams.

Carrie Bradshaw, after attending more baby and wedding showers than she could take and totalling up how much money she actually spent on her friends good fortunes with absolutely no reciprocation decided to throw a 'married to myself' party ......as did Sue Sylvester.

I don't think I'd have the balls to do that, but I love their style and the idea.

That said, this weekend was not perfect....but had some amazing memorable moments. I touched base in some way with my family....still have candy treats for a few of them forcing me to see them very soon!

I baked....passed out Valentine's candy and cookies....sent messages to the special people in my life....wore Mom's beautiful red sweater and the felt sequin heart she made for me.....

I actually saw 2 of my favorite fellows. 1 of them I had not seen in eons. He visited Mom in the hospital days before she died.....what are the chances of me running into him at an event I was attending Valentine's weekend? I take that as a definite sign from God.....as clear as Bam Bam hitting me over the head with a huge wooden club, that we will be friends forever...and our paths will continue crossing.

I had engaging phone conversations with 2 of my dearest friends in the whole wide world. 1 of them is out of state but we had a gas talking for 2 hours catching up....he and his work buddies loved the Malley's heart candy I sent....and then when I sent him a Happy Valentine's text, he made me pee my pants by responding, "Is that what all the fuss is about today?" And proceeded to wish me a very happy valentine's day back....

I was surprised and overjoyed by yet another friend I had not heard from in at least a month. We had a wonderful phone conversation....he made my day, my night and whole weekend! Hopefully, we too, will be able to catch up in person in the near future.

Beaming & Butterflies.

Realizing and recognizing the great friendships I've garnered over the years and still have in my life make me realize that being a single girl is really ok. God has been so good to me. I could not ask for a better family....and have the most amazing friends in my life across the board--from kindergarten through now--who keep me vibrant, alive, young, and most of the time, feeling loved.

I have faith that one day God will indulge me with my fantasy Valentine's Day. If I've learned one thing in life, it is never doubt the power of God. I'll keep my Valentine's Day traditions alive each February 14....my heart open.....and enjoy the mini miracles sent my way each day of the year.

No man is an island

Yes, I just "borrowed" that line.

Wish I would have coined it myself.

I'm torn on this mentality.

I prefer being self-sufficient and accomplishing tasks myself. Gives me quite a sense of satisfaction. Plus, oftentimes if someone helps you, 'certain' people hold that assist over your head indefinitely, infinity plus.

As you start climbing the ladder of life, history comes in flashbacks...you see a person or group of people or even just a photo of them and are transported back in time to that era.

And with age and maturity, you realize that these people in your past actually helped form you and pave the way to your future.

Without each and every one of them, you'd be boring, one dimensional, and a stranger to whom you know and love.

Some of us are lucky enough to keep those influential people near and dear to our hearts in our lives always.

Facebook acts as a tool to better allow us to re-connect with those special someones...

I'm quite blessed to still have people in my life I've known from birth, kindergarten, grade school, high school, college, and my professional career. God has been good to me.


A three day blitz opened the floodgates to my history--all good!

I attended the 2011 Beaumont Distinguished Alumnae Award luncheon which bridged my past and present. Two women who were at Beaumont with me received awards....faculty who taught me were in attendance....a woman I used to work with has joined the Beaumont family....and then a lovely woman in my life currently also received the honor. Joan and Mom were very good friends. Because of their friendship, I've since become good friends with she and her family, who actually invited Mom and I to Chautauqua a few years back. What a tremendous time.

I'm amazed at how life goes full circle time and time again, and more often than not, we are all connected in some way or have all crossed paths.


After the Beaumont extravaganza, I had the honor of being invited to a fantastic surprise birthday shindig--for the husband of a friend of mine. We were destined to be friends. Renee and I have known each other for eons but HOW we know each other and how many times our lives have criss crossed is the true tell tale sign our friendship will last. Renee and I worked at the same places.....I worked with her ex-husband....I've known 1 of her children forever....and then we have the college tie as she was alumni director at my alma mater for a number of years....we work together today--she as media relations specialist and I as a member of the media.

At her husband's party, I re-connected with another former co-worker of mine I've know for at least 25 years now. We picked up where we left off having a sense of familiarity. I had a very nice conversation with his wife, a new friend, and can tell that we will all continue being forever friends.


Then, if that was not enough.

I ran into my hero, my mentor, of all places --my office lunchroom

The woman who gave me my first internship is doing a project for my station. I could not believe my eyes as I saw her standing in the lunchroom. I will be ever indebted to Jane for not only giving me my first chance in this business but for being one of the best female role models of all time. To this day, Jane is a front runner with a skill level at her craft towering above all the rest. She is a brilliant producer, writer, director, editor --you name it, she does it!

Jane proves that women can do anything. You can stick to your convictions, never compromise your beliefs and integrity and still get the job done. She's a fireball who, to this day, is the hippest lady I know!


Yes, I'd love to believe that I can move mountains by myself, that I'm super woman and don't need anyone else. But looking back at my rich history and the thousands if not millions of people who have entered my life having a life-changing effect on me, I welcome company. I yearn for assistance to help me continue my evolution. I need to feel needed.

I don't want to live on this island alone.

No feeling either way

Thank goodness January is finally over.

I am the first person who says 'don't rush life' and 'savor every single second.'

I mean it, except for January 2011. Oh, it had some great moments, trust me. Actually had lots of wonderful moments! I guess I am being melodramatic. No, not me!

And the old addage, be careful what you wish for could come into play. Only God knows what's in store for the rest of 2011. Maybe it will be 10x worse than January? Or maybe a wonderful fantasy?

Thankfully my sister is feeling much better. That's a win.

I can definitely tell that I am a woman in her 'blankety blank' by the crazy happenings going on...and that's ok too. Keeps me on my toes...

Then there were not so memorable moments....and we all go through them. What keeps me strong is that Mom experienced every challenge tossed my way during this still young year. She survived. In fact she triumphed. The bad news is I don't have Mom in person to help me solve these problems. She was my rock, my savior. I just have to pray more to read the signs God may be sending. God (and Mom) will surely guide me.


The irony of it all. Two situations arose having complete opposite reactions.

The first one reminds me of the line from 'Broadcast News.' William Hurt says something like, "I feel bad that I don't feel worse."

Well, someone from my far away past who withdrew himself a long time ago revealed that he is ill and has cancer.

Honestly, I felt bad that I did not feel worse. Heck, I felt bad that I felt absolutely NOTHING. I felt sorry for him because you never want anyone to be sick. And then a little anger bubbled up that he's only brought grief into my life, and now, the possibility of passing on a deadly disease. Moving on. Went back to feeling nothing. Absolutely nothing.


The other situation evokes more emotion than I ever imagined. I have a friend who helped me immensely after Mom passed away. I thought we'd be forever friends. It seems that friendship has stalled. But I really don't know. It could be a misunderstanding on my part as I often jump to conclusions. I feel helpless and just want to scream at the top of my lungs to get it back. I'd love to be able to reach him and see where we stand. It really means a lot to me.


Only God knows what will happen....being a finite human being, I really hope he brings my friend back to me. But I wonder, maybe God put him into my life for that small stretch to get me through. I'm very selfish. I want it all and want it forever! Again, must keep the faith and see where God takes me.


Thankfully, I had a dental appointment this week. My dental hygienist, who is also a friend, had no idea what she was in for when she asked that common question, "how are you doing?" She's a gem as she doubles as my therapist! Thank you Fran!

As you can see, I'm just glad January is over hoping that February through December brings so many more blessings than demons.

Sure sign 'spring' is around the corner

Spring training that is!

I'm usually the one who adores the fact that life waltz's along at a fine pace. Sure, it's usually chaotic, ridiculously busy, a juggling act from dawn to dusk, highlighted with the daily ups and downs which range from bursting into tears sadness to the tears of laughter running down my face. Certainly never a dull moment.

But for me, life does not normally fly by. I love that aspect. For example a week long vacation often feels like 3. It's usually never gone in the blink of an eye. I'm blessed and lucky in that respect.

Though Christmas seems like a million years ago (my vibrant live tree is still up & 1 gift remains for a dear friend), I could not be happier that we are nearing the end of January.

One challenge after another--personally, health-wise, and professionally. Oh, don't worry. The glass is still topped off with the crazy cherry Kool-Aid that everyone is serving up.

Life could be much worse or much better. I like focusing on the much worse and counting my blessings rather than harping on what's missing, lacking, my failures, or where I could be if .....

Right about now is when I perk up because the Cleveland Indians are on their yearly press tour getting out mingling with the fans excited that baseball is just around the corner.

End of this week, the Indians equipment truck leaves for Arizona. Ah! Many people look forward to key points throughout the year.....I celebrate the day the Tribe equipment truck packs up and heads south because that can only mean one thing.

Spring Training.

The arrival of Spring.

Warmer temperatures.

Longer days.

Baseball.

Romance.

Hot dogs and stadium mustard.

Sun tanning.

Patios.

A very happy Danielle.

What an absolutely amazing weekend. 1 of my dearest friends and I have been on target the last couple of months. She had been out of town and we STILL had mental telepathy on what we both wanted to do this weekend. Uncanny. When I told her where I wanted to go she said good, because she already had tickets!! It was like Christmas all over again.

So we trekked to the Lake Erie Monsters Game, which is always fun in itself. This game was extra special because of the friends surrounding me plus 'my' Cleveland Indians were there front and center as part of their Caravan Tour visiting with fans.

Oh my gosh. The place was packed. For those nay-sayers who hate baseball or do not think Cleveland Indians Baseball is alive and well, you must have been living under a rock this week. Fans came out in force to see the Tribe-sters all week long at their various venues and public appearances. I love this team and this game!

So the crew at the Monsters game included: Matt LaPorta, Shin-Soo Choo, Michael Brantley, Tony Sipp, and Manager Manny Acta.

An extra special treat was seeing former co-workers of mine who showed up to shoot the event...and then a 5 minute interview session giving all media access to Manny Acta and Michael Brantley.

(Mark, cameraman at WEWS, one of my former co-workers)

I am about to bust with anticipation of the upcoming season which should be entertaining, exciting, and so magical.

If 'my' Indians can not get me out of the January blue funk, no one and nothing will.

Turn the hourglass, the meter is running. The next few months is my time to get all my ducks in a row. My personal 'spring cleaning' or 'lent' to get back on track. Once baseball season is upon us, that's it folks. I'm gone until the final game of the World Series!

And it's such a wonderful place to be! I hope throughout the season, many of you will join me!

One hell of a year already!

Really?

I've learned not to question certain things, first and foremost God's plan for me and my loved ones.

And then just roll with it baby....

The first 2 weeks of 2011 have been interesting and challenging to say the very least.

New Year's eve and day were in 'stand by' mode as we waited to hear whether my sister would be coming home from the hospital. We had multiple plans in place to ring in the new year together.
If she came home New Year's Eve, we'd go through as scheduled with our potato dumpling and sauerkraut feast....if she came home before noon New Year's day, we'd try dumplings and sauerkraut....if she came home after noon, we'd gather at Auntie's so we were together and have an alternate dinner.....and if she did not come home New Year's day, we'd go visit her and then still share a meal of some kind together!

Whew! I'm exhausted just reliving that scenario.

My sister wound up coming home New Year's night. We cooked up a hodge podge meal for the rest of us....as she was still not too keen on real food, especially the ethnic food we prepared. While Janice slept, since no one can sleep in the hospital, we carried on and welcomed in the new year together as one big happy family! It was actually an awesome evening.

We also celebrated my youngest niece's birthday....

I can not even believe all the food we prepared and the desserts. Oh, the desserts.

I'm convinced since New Year's resolutions usually do not begin on New Year's day, they are snakebit from the getgo....but it's always ambitious to have goals and set your sights high.

The funniest thing of all is the next day, my sister asked my aunt why we did not save her any dumplings? Trust me. When we wind up making 35 pounds of potatoes, we normally have leftovers, even if for a meal or two!

We've been playing tug-of-war about how many potatoes to make. My youngest niece and I always want to make at least 40 pounds. You can never have too many potato dumplings with sauerkraut and pork, especially since they taste so much better the next day and the day after that...

But, the insanity did not end here.

I overruled myself and wound up going to the Browns-Steelers game. Normally, when it's extremely cold and snowy, I opt for warmer Browns' watching surroundings. Not only was the game over before it began, the weather was typical football weather chasing me home during the 3rd quarter.

As my sister recuperated, she had a minor setback and wound up having another emergency surgery the following weekend. Really?

Though my sister had a rigorous doctor agenda this week, things are gradually settling down.

Finally, the day is here. New Year's dinner round #2 is upon us. The 'real' feast with 35 pounds of potatoes, sauerkraut, and pork. Whew hoo. It's an assembly line. Each person has their own necessary job. I usually wind up with flour in my hair, and everywhere really.

Next year, I think we must re-think my job. I was in charge of grinding the potatoes and 1/2 the time forgot to put the blade in after pouring the potatoes into the cheese cloth. It made for much laughter and happiness!

It takes a little while to re-acquaint ourselves with our assembly line, but we got it going and cranked them out....

Then we teased everyone. Auntie, Sara, and I went to church so everyone had to wait...and wait...and wait!

Finally, the moment had arrived. Our long awaited, postponed traditional New Year's celebration. Well worth the wait. And as usual, wonderful quality family time to kick off the new year. God is good.

Just have to keep saying 'everything happens for a reason....' and 'God knows what he is doing.'

So in the midst of one of the coldest winters on record, many challenges surround us from all sides already....

As Mom always said, we are survivors. God won't toss anything our way we can not handle. I believe.

What does God have in store for 2011?

Looking back at 2010 still amazes me. Never in a million years did I ever imagine more than half of the shenanigans dancing into my life.

2010 was a mixture of still grieving Mom immensely, which unfortunately will be the lot for the rest of my life....intermixed with more sadness as Uncle Bill passed away....however, as Mom echoes in my head daily, God is good.

God and Mom brought me much happiness from my family and friends, especially old friends who re-entered my life.

My trip to the OBX with my best college friends reassured me that I am loved and am not alone in this world. Definitely just what the doctor ordered, though the wild horses eluded us :(

Uncle Bill actually waited for me to come home before passing away....the day I arrived home and visited him with the hummingbird wind chime I brought home, he knew who I was, got that great smile he always made and thanked me for his gift. I miss him so, but I'm sure nothing compared to how much Auntie misses him.

After handling Mom's funeral just 6 months before, when he passed, my family was great in swinging into action to handle everything for Auntie. Being friends with the funeral director, I immediately called Kevin on his cell phone and set the wheels in motion. Such a wonderful time looking through old pictures as we put picture walls together. Though a sad time, it brought about tons of laughter, which is one of the greatest gifts Uncle Bill always shared with us.

The day of Uncle Bill's funeral, I left the church and saw everyone weeping pointing at the hearse. I couldn't even imagine. As I got closer I realized everyone was half laughing, half crying as a squirrel danced around under the hearse. Uncle Bill always fed the birds and squirrels and this truly was a sign that he was there and would be there with us forever. Even today, as I walk to and from church, I see that same crazy squirrel (Uncle Bill) taunting me!

Cleveland Indians' baseball played a huge role--really saving me on those days I didn't want to be here. I know it's hard for people who don't like baseball to comprehend how I feel about this sport, and more importantly Cleveland Indians' baseball. It's a part of me, my life. My guys pulled me out from the bottom of the well time and time again. Without baseball, I'd be a vine that shrivels up and dies. I guess it is an expensive habit, but seeing it's really the only thing I do, and how it saved my life in 2010, it's well worth the cost. A habit I am not ready to give up. Baseball allowed me to visit my best friend in Tampa, Florida and share a day of baseball with our entire family and close friends in a loge at Progressive Field. When I think back at what makes me who I am and what brings tears of joy to my eyes--family, close friends, singing, and Cleveland Indians' baseball. And when family & friends are intertwined with Cleveland Indians baseball, I'm walking on air!

I re-connected with grade school friends, who once again, gave me a reason to continue onward..... I can not even put into words how Susie, Sheila, Teresa, Johnny, and Sal brought me back to my roots and made me remember what is truly important in life. They were excited to see me and liked me for me--not who I've become, what I do, who I know, what kind of car I drive or even how many pounds I've packed on since our grade school days. I will be ever indebted to all of their friendships and how they grasped me out of oblivion.

What's even more chilling--the wonderful stories every single friend of mine has about my Mom. I never knew that she touched so many people's lives, but she did making me love her even more, if that's even possible, and really giving me the oomph to try and emulate her as much as I can.

There is one friend in particular who really brought me back to life. I always think of the line in "While you were sleeping" which says 'I may have saved your life that day, but you really saved mine....' and that is exactly the way I feel about this wonderful human being. They finally energized me to take down my Christmas decorations May 16, 2010 and start living again....

The summer was magical and nothing I'd ever imagined.....the entire year really one big fantasy dream....

The people I re-connected with and have been able to keep in touch with mind blowing.

I still can not even believe I made a 2nd trip to Tampa to visit my friend Craig but also see the Cleveland Browns' away opener.

An emotional time for me (well, honestly, when wasn't I emotional in 2010?) was Mom's birthday. I remember it as if it were yesterday. My schedule had changed at work for a few days...and when I was not at work I was glued to the television watching the Chilean Miners being rescued --on Mom's birthday. Call me crazy, but I honestly believe Mom had something to do with that miracle. I never put anything past my Mother.

When my family gathered for the 1 year anniversary of Mom's death, she did it to us again. As we sat in Trattoria in Little Italy, a rainbow sat right above our restaurant and the text messages started coming in from friends saying Mom was talking to us all. Thank you Mom!

Winding up the year, yet more baseball stuff as I hit SnowDays and had the most amazing time in my home away from home! I can not believe I had the guts to go down the Batterhorn twice and then skated for the next 3 hours. Again, when baseball, family, and my best friends are involved, I'm happiest.

Mom would always say "God is good." As well as: live life to the fullest....don't worry about what you have no control over....God will always provide.....

Being me, I'm trying to figure out what will happen in 2011 and doubting that it could ever top 2010. But Mom brings me back. I have no clue what God has in store for me or any of us....but you can be sure, it will be one hell of an adventure. And if I put total trust in Him, live life to the fullest following in God and Mom's footsteps, not only will it be as good as 2010 but surpass it at warped speed!