Boy, did the Easter Bunny dump a load....

As if there was not enough chaos in my life right now....

The Easter Bunny pulled a huge prank (and it's not even April Fool's Day anymore) and dumped a huge load in my lap.

Now, I know I don't have a huge blog following, and to those of you who read this, you may say, 'what's the problem?'

You hit the nail on the head!

I may write in this blog once a day, more than likely with my crazy life 3x a week if I am lucky.

That small opening does not really allow for anyone to get to know me...REALLY know me.

A good thing actually. I don't think I really want complete strangers to know every A, B, and 3 about me, my life and family. As I've said before, this blog's dual role is to continue sharpening my writing skills as well as pondering the great questions of the day or even entertain and bring a smile to someone's face every once in a while.

And I am within my rights to share, vent or pontificate a topic.

But, not really knowing someone or walking in their shoes or knowing what they are going through 24 hours a day does not give someone else the right to 'meddle' or 'think' they know another person's needs.

Frankly, no one knows what I have been going through for the last 4+ years....let alone the last 3 weeks with that crazy guy high on PCP crashing through my company's 'supposedly secure and gated' parking garage --UNDERGROUND --and totalling my vehicle. The man who totalled my car has stolen precious minutes /hours, time, sanity and peace of mind right out from under me over the last number of weeks...and it's not over. Many more hours of lost time AND $$$$$$ await in light of everything I still must do to rectify this situation.

My God and my Mother have been with me the entire time, through thick and thin. Thank God my Mother is better but 4 years ago she was extremely ill.....and though a handful of people have helped (thank you), their 3% is no comparison to the 97% to 100% I've been giving the last 4 years and beyond. I'm just as overwhelmed today as I was 4 or 5 years ago. Even though I have a wonderful life, I really gave up the life I knew and could have had.

We've had help over the years (thank you again) and I do have a few very dear friends I know I can count on, but come on, the masses were not beating down our door when the going got really tough....and still not today. Heck, I'm trying to spend a measly 48 hours with a dear friend....and it's like trying to move mountains and offer my first born (if there ever is a first born) to coordinate this cataclysmic event.

So who's bright idea was it that I 'needed' to reunite with my father? That's not what I need. Not even a blip on my list of things to do. And that's what I am talking about. No one knows what anyone else needs...so don't meddle.....

I'm really not sure what spurred this on....but what I do know is that after 20+ years, on Easter 2009, my father leaves a message saying he would love to come hear me sing at Church.

Again, many of you would say --great! Let him come and listen to you. And that's fine, he can, it's a free world.

But that ship sailed. He borrowed money from me, said he 'needed time to get his life together' and took off.....never to be heard from again....

Until now. A day late and a dollar short. Don't get me wrong. He's a nice man, he's my father and I would not be here today without he and Mom (who is my true hero!). We still send he and my uncle a Christmas letter each year. However, I am not overhauling my life for this man right now. My life is back-timed. Each precious second is already accounted for....

I am rejuvenating my life. I have a rich life just the way it is. I need to focus more on me....my health.....my God-given talents....continue giving 110% at my job.....continue spending quality time with Mom and her great come-back.....as well as my "Dave Letterman top 20 list of things to accomplish in 2009" drafted back on January 1, 2009.

More importantly, there are a number of people I love dearly who I would rather catch up with and spend quality time with.... I am so blessed to have great friends all over the world --grade school, high school, college and career-wise who, because of lifestyles traveling at warped speed, we've not kept up as we'd like, but we HAVE kept up....and when we see each other, it's like we've never missed a beat!!!!


I'm sorry. For those of you reading this right now, I must sound like an awful human being. Again, I do love my father. However, whatever the motivation and good intentions, he picked one hell of a time to resurface. Plain and simple: I don't have the time for him. I don't. My life is booked up with other pressing priorities that take precedent and really mean a great deal to me. I guess I am a bad person, because my father's name is not on that priority list.

I have some big projects I am working on over the next 7 months....and one that was not anticipated (my car situation), and frankly, I don't have the time for this unexpected development.


I just said to Mom yesterday, 'I will always be that 12 year old that everyone bosses around.' In fact, the few conflicts I've been involved in over the last 2 or 3 years were because of that factoid. On one hand folks tell me --"do what YOU want to do." And in their next breath they say, "do this, it's best for you!" And they tell ME what do to...what's best for me.


What's best for me right now is folks not telling me what to do....folks not meddling....folks respecting my wishes and my opinions, whatever they may be....and God giving me the energy, the strength, the courage, the patience, 4 extra hours each day, the perseverance, and the peace of mind to buckle down, take the bull by the horns, and continue crossing off MY to-do list which was drafted back on January 1, 2009.

Not the to-do list that everyone else and their brother 'think' is good for me and my happiness.