Lent Day #8

The challenge is on and I am unsure if I am up for it. It's funny how this week has been exasperating. Yet it's an absurd thought to even compare what you went through 2000 years ago to the kind of week I am having. You were persecuted for your beliefs. You were tortured and sacrificed your life for the good of mankind. I am frustrated, annoyed, and having anxiety attacks and twitching eyes because, at times, I am dealing with lazy, uninspired individuals. However, then I have to think "God made these people. There has to be something good inside of them." Yet, it is so hard to see sometimes.

I must pull from within and ask for your help. I can not make it through by myself --Lent or no Lent. I am in no way perfect (hence, my cry for help during this most holy season). And believe it or not, there are so many followers who affect my life and my Mother's life each and every day with their selfless acts of kindness! However, my perception today --today I have run into many self-serving, pompous individuals who think they can do no wrong. Let it go, let it go my good friends tell me. It is very hard. And usually in life, whether work or play, these are the handful of individuals who are considered the "teacher's pet" and think they CAN do no wrong.

The snowball just keeps rolling down the mountain! I give 100+ percent. I do my job, and on a regular basis, do it almost flawlessly. Yet, I get hauled into the big office for things I never did, situations that were blown out of proportion, and scrutiny in a bigger scope than most people get scrutinized. I really wish it was an even playing field. I wish 'everyone' in this world was held accountable, especially for their work performance. All I can do is the best I can do and be the best I can be. I guess I can not control other folks' work ethics, dedication, devotion, multi-tasking skills, and common sense. My Mother has been an inspiration. She had to work 3 jobs at one time to take care of my sister and I. Society today has let us down. Many in my generation and younger see life totally differently than our parents' generation. It is very unfortunate. As you can see, this day, I need you MOST!

Again, this is mental anguish. Not at all what you went through 2000 years ago. However, I am having a very difficult time letting the bad judgement of people roll off my back. I am letting the laziness of others overtake my thoughts. It is a world gone mad!

Please help. Please give me the strength, the patience, the perseverence, gift of forgiveness, and the silence to bite my tongue when I want to say what is on my mind about the chaos and ridiculous antics going on all around me! I know you, God, have the final say but sometimes it is hard to hear "you'll get your reward in heaven" when others are trouncing over your good reputation and getting undeserving kudos. It just seems unfair. But who says life is fair!

Jesus, why do things like this happen to good people. Injustice is a pet peeve and I can not stand for it.

Then I become grounded. Just as I am about to give up hope, I read today's reflection and readings. "Forgive 70 times 7....turn the other cheek....do good to those who hate you."

My little black book reflection sums it up best-"try this on a small scale...the way I treat the people I work with, my willingness to 'die' when a cutting remark is made and I want to stab back."

Thank you for the guidance. This reflection will be very difficult for the duration of Lent and Life, but I have to do it. There could be huge repercussions if I do not follow your lead, follow your preaching. No matter what the simple-minded, the selfish and self-serving do to me, I have to clench my fist, bite my tongue and say "what would Jesus do?"