Who's a pest?

Do you remember the children's book "Who's a pest?: A Homer Story?"

It was 'An I can read book' by Crosby Newell Bonsall.

I loved to read as a child and would always make Mom angry by saying I was a pest! Even today when folks' joke and say 'Who's there?" I go, "It's just the pest!"

Those days have changed. Even being the English major, I never read and have pretty much forgotten everything I learned in high school and college.

I digress.

This week, I truly had cute (I think they were cute) little fuzzy pests up in the attic.

What an ordeal.

I think we've had them for a while by the ripped up paper bags and worn paper boxes. For all I know they could be nesting warmly in one of the hundreds of stacked boxes.

However, just within the last few weeks I heard what sounded as if it were an animal running on the roof. But the more I listened (usually early in the morning), the more it sounded as if it were just above me which was definitely NOT the roof.

I finally got a hold of a pest agency to come out and look around. The gentleman seemed very knowledgeable of his craft. He surveyed the house, never found an animal in the attic but saw 'signs' something had been there and saw ways he or she could have entered.

We're always leary at having strangers come inside, but I guess for certain tasks, you have to let them in and be trusting.

He gave me the rundown and what he wanted to do: trim the trees first and foremost so that animals did not even have access to the roof, fix the soffits, and as a last resort, put traps.

I'd never dive into this career, but I imagine being a pest control agent could be quite exciting. You never know what animal you are dealing with unless you catch it red handed.

You have to come back to the house every day around the same time to check the traps, the areas where they possibly enter, and see if they've returned.

My pest control guy said he hopes the tree trimming will do the trick, but it's always much more fun trapping the little buggers. Not sure if that's my definition of fun!

The first day he showed up was election day. Once he filled me in on his diagnosis, for the next 30 minutes we stood and spoke about election day, the United States, voting, the constitution and so much more. I was intrigued because he was sharing his beliefs and way of life, which honestly, I'd never heard of before.

At the end of the discussion, I surmised that he adhered to sovereignty. He said he had no debt, no bills, did not have to pay taxes or parking tickets or mortgage, or anything. He also said he was above the current law followed by the USA (which startled me a bit) and shared so much more that he was currently studying in law school.

I just stood there taking it all in trying to figure out how this pest control guy by day, law student by night would ever mix the two careers. He seemed to be in love with both?

I had to focus on the task at hand and hope that he would solve my pest problem.

After about a week of returning, trimming, checking and fixing, I hope he's rectified the situation. I am kind of afraid to return to the scene of the crime alone but one day will have to get the nerve to face my demon pest, who hopefully is in my past.