A week of closeness

After our uncle's death, we prepared ourselves for a very long week ahead.

I thank God that I knew exactly how to proceed to ease my aunt's burden just a little.

I sure hope I don't have to spring into action again too soon....after this loss. Please, a little reprieve.

Though we just had a death in the family, everyone remained upbeat and remembered the good times, the fun, the laughter, and my uncle's great jokes!

Normal drill: funeral home, Alesci's, flowers, plan the liturgy and pick the music, CD's for the funeral home, box of Puffs, water/pop for the family at the funeral home, get the pall bearers and readers, and decide where to eat after the service...among so many other things.

It was such a treat going through my aunt's old pictures in order to make picture displays at the funeral.

My niece, aunt and I went through boxes of pictures.

What a walk down memory lane.

I found the picture of me and my aunt 'going down Niagra Falls.'

A great memory for me!


My niece got a charge out of the old pictures, and how everyone looked so long ago.

I admit, she made fun of yours truly in a picture where I must have been about a year or so being held by my uncle --she said I looked like "Super Mario!" Very funny!


I felt like my niece was a private eye. She pulled out her new fangled phone and was taking pictures of all the pictures as if she was an investigator.


My aunt mustered up courage and was so strong all weekend long. She was cute telling everyone how she asked for courage and got it!

She was quite touched by the great turnout and how many people loved my uncle and love my aunt.


We were all holding it together until my aunt's little neighbor Rosa showed up after school and ran into my aunt's arms sobbing. Pulled out the Puffs and just let the faucets flow for a little...


My uncle looked wonderful. I must admit, there was more celebration and remembering rather than tears.

In between viewings, we went for the early bird special down the street and had a wonderful Italian dinner.

Funeral day--a mixture of laughter and tears. My uncle fed the birds and all of God's creatures. After the funeral mass, there was a little squirrel who did not want to vacate my uncle's hearse which made everyone burst into tears--we know he was there for our uncle.

And my sister was convinced that Uncle Bill took her earring, which she left on her night stand when she went to sleep but it was missing the next morning? Hmmm???

Proceeding from the funeral home to church, a man walking his dog made the sign of the cross as the hearse passed. Mom used to always do that too. A very touching moment, at least for me.

I thank my stars above that I was able to hold it together to sing my uncle's funeral Mass with the assistance of my friend and choir director, David.

Another wonderful bonding experience after mass at lunch with at least 40 of my aunt's dearest friends and relatives. A nice sign to her that she DOES have support and will forever.

And then on the way home, believe it or not, we buzzed through Lakeview Cemetery to view their Daffodil Hill. I was not sure how that would go over with my aunt who had just lost her husband but the vision so tremendous, it was well worth it.

Sunday: it's time to gamble and start living again. My aunt and uncle had not been able to go gambling in recent months so the family hopped in two cars and headed to Presque Isle to let it ride! Now, this was such a wonderful time for all involved. Logical way for my family to honor my uncle and spend quality time together! A day I will never ever forget and cherish forever.


It's true, tragedy pulls people together. I hope that once we get through this weekend, the closeness remains.

Never thought I'd be here

I have not been around for a while and you probably won't see me for a little while longer.

I do have eons to tell.

So much has happened over the last 3 weeks. A mix of wonderful, good, and so much more bad. Well, bad in my eyes as a finite human being. Actually, what has happened is joyous and liberating for Mom.

'Stuff' has happened that I never dreamed would materialize so soon.

Tonight, for instance, as I was shopping for something to wear to Mom's wake and funeral, I began thinking. Why do people buy black for funerals?

Now, I wear a lot of black anyway. Not sure why? I'm not a down person or morbid or sad. On the contrary, full of life and busting at the seams with energy!

However, black suits me.

Yet, I'm also a leopard, zebra, purple, blue, red and green girl.

So WHY am I looking for black? And why a black suit?

I NEVER wear suits anymore. I rarely wear dresses or skirts. Maybe when I become my svelte self again, I'll wear more of a variety.

I just can't see wearing something I normally would not wear to such an event. Straying from who I am to fit a mold or satisfy an image.

So, I'm opting to be myself.

Auntie did not want us to wear open toe shoes or flip flops so I will honor her wishes there.

Being me and the over-achiever I am, I'm sure I will go through a hundred outfits and try on each one before I choose the ideal one for Mom's wake and funeral.

However, I see myself wearing my new black pants, new black shoes and a top that is me and is who Mom knows me as.

And the same for the funeral. Actually, I have a wonderful pastel skirt that Mom just loves --purple, pink, white and black. Every time I wear it, no matter where I am, I get compliments --from men and women both.

Let's face it. This is Mom's day. Her last hurrah. I'd love to honor her by wearing her favorite skirt, my new black boots and a nice top. Something that Mom would say --'That's my girl!'

New beginnings

A bittersweet day.

Friday, certainly a day of endings and new beginnings.

We recently lost our former Pastor, Father Anthony Zepp.

Fr. Zepp gave my Mother a wonderful opportunity to serve our church for so many years as well as becoming a member of our extended family (he and his family).

He will truly be missed. I'm sure this was his greeting for so many, but I loved when he welcomed me by saying, 'Hi Honey' and gave me a big hug!

Mom and I were quite fortunate to see him only weeks ago as I sang a funeral for one of our parishioners. Fr. Zepp was ailing but attended the funeral Mass.

Friday, we said goodbye to him so he could begin his life of eternity with the Lord above. I'm sure the first face he saw was his Mother, who we also miss!

His funeral Mass, a moving and deserving sendoff. There had to be over 200 priests on hand saying goodbye to their brother. Bishop Anthony Pilla officiated the Mass. It was so nice seeing former parishioners, friends, and members of Father's family we've not seen in years.

I'm extremely proud and blessed to have my religion be the main staple in my life. Though we were at a funeral mass, it was not a sad occasion. It was a joyful, beautiful remembrance of a truly great man.

And, seeing how faith-filled my Mother is and hoping that one day, I too, will carry that trait makes me look forward to each new morning.

Mom has garnered so much respect being such a wonderful woman.

During the ending procession, Father's nephew, a Pall Bearer, leaned over and gave Mom a big kiss.

But wait. There's more.

During the ending procession, Bishop Anthony Pilla did the same. He not only greeted Mom but lay his hand on her head and gave her a blessing.

I'm in awe at how much love is extended toward my Mother. She certainly deserves it, but the fact that there are still caring people in the world offers hope for our future.

Father Zepp went immediately to heaven. That's a given. We mourn his loss but praise his life and rejoice that he is no longer in pain and has met up with family and friends who have gone before him. We extend our prayers and thoughts to those left on this earth that we all can carry on his legacy as caring, loving servants of God.

Now the next bittersweet news doesn't even compare to the death of a loved one.

However, none the less, a life-changing event.

Friday, one of my most cherished possessions was taken from me for good.

It was first taken from me back on March 25, 2009.

Friday, my car was towed to its final resting place. Very telling. As we were at Father Zepp's funeral, the insurance tow company took my totalled vehicle.

Not seeing my car in the garage anymore --reality hit as I realized my car was gone for good, gone forever.

Again, it's just a 'thing.' But a momentous occasion in my life as well.

One chapter closed, the next one opened.

God's in charge and knows what he is doing.

We just need to follow his lead, do the best we can and know that no matter what, God is on our side and with us every step of the way. Every trial and tribulation. Every joyous event. Every time someone persecutes us for doing what we believe is right. He's right by our side.